The recent article, “Divorced Wives: Why Frum Acceptance of Divorce Led to Disastrous Results,” presents itself as a commentary on the growing normalization of divorce within the frum community. However, its overwhelmingly one-sided perspective and blatant bias against women undermine any meaningful contribution to the conversation. A more balanced and nuanced approach is needed to explore the true challenges facing frum marriages and the consequences of divorce.

Blame Misplaced: Feminism as a Convenient Scapegoat

The article attributes the erosion of family values to the influence of feminism, painting it as the root cause of marital breakdowns. This oversimplification ignores the cultural pressures within the frum world that also contribute to these issues.

One glaring omission is the discussion of the role of young men who are often raised with the expectation to exclusively learn Torah, with financial support provided by their in-laws. While Torah study is a cornerstone of frum life, this reliance can sometimes foster an unhealthy dynamic, where men are neither financially independent nor emotionally prepared for the realities of marriage.

When these young men enter marriage, many lack the maturity and skills to contribute as equal partners. This dynamic places an undue burden on women, who are expected to manage the home, raise children, and often support the family financially—all while respecting their husbands as the “head of the household.” Feminism is not the sole disruptor of family values; systemic imbalances within the community also deserve scrutiny.

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